i have been reading bck all my blog post when i was a student nurse..and i realize that's its a good way to reflect back what you have done in your past life. I realized that I enjoyed writing down all my experiences and emotions into it but after I started working,i lost the enthusiam to blog..maybe i don't have any mood or lost the passion to write...sigh...come to think of it,i have been keeping diaries from the time i was 12 yrs till college life..and i nvr threw my diaries away as it was too precious to me..even my sister got to read it (although i scolded her as it was my personal thing) but now that i have become a young working adult, i seldom blog already..so today i'm gonna write down all my thoughts here..
After 2 yrs of working,i realize the passion for me in nursing is losing...i'm beginning to see a lot of situations that i don't like for ex dr's blaming us nurses for the mistakes, fussy patients, us nurses working like hell and yet nobody appreciate what we are doing, dr treating us like shit (esp this particular oncologist),ward managers who's never satisfied in what we are doing and only like to point out our mistake instead of motivating us to do better..etc..etc...no wonder i see all my colleagues work is for the sake of working because of their bond and because its their way of earning a living...as for me, i realize i also need to pull myself up as i'm starting to become one of them..i'm starting to lose patience, becoming more lazy and more unmotivated as the time goes by which is no good at all :( i really need to buck up on this area as why am i in this field and what is my purpose...last time,when i was a student,i still have the passion and now into the real working world..where have it all gone too?? UGH!!! I wish i can become like one of my friend nicole who got a reward from one her pt as her pt can see she got the passion for nursing eventhough she got such a hectic working life (even worse than mine) i need to pull up myself up on this area...
About my personal life, so far i'm having a mixed of emotions inside me and i don't know why..am very scared and doubtful to venture into another area which is the BGR area...after reading all those christian dating books like "i kiss dating goodbye" "when boy meet girl" "passion and purity" and hearing from friends about their love life, i always thought "its a good thing i don't have to go through all this yet" and suddenly BOOM!! out of the blue...smthg happens and i never felt so overwhelmed, doubtful and scared before...well,oh i can say is it take time to know a person and TIME will only tell whether are we meant for each other and whether is it God's will that we should be together...all I can say is i'm taking it slowwwww in this area ;) but i do believe that everything will happen perfectly In His Time. After all, God is the perfect matchmaker. I'm still praying about it ;)
IN HIS TIME, IN HIS TIME
HE MAKES ALL THINGS BEAUTIFUL IN HIS TIME
LORD, PLEASE SHOW ME EVERYDAY
AS YOU'RE TEACHING ME YOUR WAY
AND I'LL DO JUST WHAT YOU SAY
IN YOUR TIME.
IN YOUR TIME, IN YOUR TIME
YOU MAKE ALL THINGS BEAUTIFUL IN YOUR TIME
LORD, MY LIFE TO YOU I BRING
MAY EACH SONG I HAVE TO SING
BE TO YOU A LOVELY THING
IN YOUR TIME
BE TO YOU A LOVELY THING
IN YOUR TIME.
well, as for my friends, i'm very very blessed to have such good friends that stick throughout the good and bad times..although we are working in different departments now but we still find time to hang out and catch up with each other and also not forgetting my bestfren from high school as well, we have known each other for 10 years now and still counting
Ever since i got to know the grace gospel, blessings have be coming to my family..but i still struggling to accept the fact God wants good thing for my life and we don't have to do anything about it and we can just sit down and Rest In His Presence even though i have attended TNCC for 2 years..oh well,am still letting go of my previous teaching to embrace this new one...but I do know that my love for Jesus will never die and go away..for Jesus love me this i know for the bible tells me so :)
phew..what a long overdue post..this is all about my life :)
